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South Ribble

ENGLAND

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So? Manchester United always LOSE!

José Mourhino team elimination from the Champions league last night was met by suggesting this was a normal result for the Club.

So that explains that then.

Gareth Takes FOUR!

Yes in spite of general despair at the demise of our former No.1 goalkeeper, Gareth Southgate has stood by his player, calling him up for the 'Friendlies' today!

He has added Pope from Burnley so we now have 4 goalkeepers.

SAM SACKED and told to stick his football!

Sam Allerdyce, known as Red Adair for his fire-fighting skills, has been sacked by Everton football club. Following his job saving the club from relegation. Thanks a Bunch!

Arséne Wenger Survives the EUROPA League!

Arséne Wenger explained that he didn't see Danny Wellbeck dive for that penalty. 'I didn't see what happened, it was so far away and I was having a coffee at the time.'

'Look, divers are now part of the game and I think we must rely on the authorities.'

Gab Baxter - Football Gags Sampler!

Follow Gab Baxter on Twitter at ArtSport.UK

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